Got Busted by the Fresheazy

I have to admit that Jeff and I frequently patronize the Fresh and Easy down the street. Every time we visit, we make a point of parking in the "Hybrid Only" or "Family Only" parking spots in spite of the fact that we both drive 10+ year old gas guzzlers and have zero kids. We do it because we don't think it's fair that we should have to walk farther to the store simply because we can't afford cars that aren't old, and I don't feel inclined to give birth at this time.

Today as I was leaving with my merchandise, the store manager, Ramon (I rrrrroll my "R" when I say it) confronted me about my vehicle.

RRRRRamon: "Excuse me , Mam. I noticed that You're Parrrrrrked in the Hybrrrrid only spot."

Me: "Yessiree. Is there a problem?"

RRRRRamon: "Well your vehicle doesn't appearrrrr to be a hybrrrrrid."

Me: "Oh, it's been converted to run on water. I'd lift the hood and show you, but I'm in kind of a hurry. I've got a Greenpeace meeting in like ten minutes."

RRRRRamon: I think that you are pulling my leg. (Who says that?!) Please, in the future, parrrrk your vehicle (what he meant to say was "gas guzzling ghettotank") elsewhere, Mam.

Me: "What is this world coming to when a young woman is forced by her local market to park in the back of the parking lot simply because she is poor and childless? Goodbye, Rrrrramon. Goodbye FORRRREVERRR!"